Yes, everyone at some point in their lives probably suffers from some form, or forms, of situational ADD. People joke all the time that they have ADD, they can't think straight today because of ADD, they've "caught" the ADD bug, on and on and you get the picture. Maybe you've said it yourself?
I am a sufferer of ADD. I am quite sure I had it my entire life. I never slept well, even as a child, because my mind was always racing all over the place--anyplace that was anything aside from blank or relaxed. I was never physically hyper, but I could not control my overactive mind. I was smart; I AM smart. My elementary school was amazing and, because I never presented as a discipline problem, those years were glorious. Middle school was essentially the same; there were wonderful teachers, structured work with schedules provided, so I thrived and had straight A's all 3 years. High School began to present issues. I got my first B my freshman year in a science class that had a less than organized teacher. He wasn't a bad teacher; he just didn't provide quite the structure and detailed organization that I needed. Looking back, I wonder if in all those early years my absolute need (yes, it was a need) to perform perfectly was tied up and tangled into the ADD. I followed the instructions exactly as they were given, so there was no reason to get anything other than 100. I will have to look into that idea another time.
As I went through high school and came across other teachers that were vague or open to interpretation or simply gave deadlines for items due, my grades gradually dropped. By senior year I was even getting C's. Okay, yes, I know, doesn't sound like a big deal--but for a student with a weighted average of over 4.0, it should have been a flashing neon sign! I became frazzled, I cut school days, and was in jeopardy of not walking at graduation because of the missed school days. (for anyone that knew me then and is just now learning of this, I apologize for any shock you may be suffering from) I begged and pleaded and cried and did walk, graduating with honors. Oh, did I mention that I didn't fill out the standard "form" all seniors filled out as a kind of fielding out for scholarships? I missed the deadline. I knew all I had to do was fill it out, but it overwhelmed me! I had no idea what I wanted to do after graduation; when I would try to "see" the future I just couldn't visualize anything, and without being able to "see" anything I could not react or take action.
I went off to college as any honors high school graduate was expected to do. What a disaster! I think I've already blogged about it so I'll keep it short...I made it 2 years. I absolutely, positively could not function in a way I needed to to be able to succeed. I had no organizational skills, no time budgeting skills; all I could do was manage to go into an overwhelmed panic over all the due dates and pull all-nighter after all-nighter until that took a toll on me and one lonely night, I cried for 2 hours in the bathroom of my dorm floor. It was such a low moment that I knew something had to be done, and that was my last semester of college.
Twenty something years later (oh my, almost thirty something lol!) I see at least a couple of my kids, who shall remain nameless for this post, going through almost identical emotions and anxieties as me. I can see it on their face the minute they shut down from being overwhelmed with something. I can see it on a paper they finish that has incomplete answers--not from the lack of ability to do the problems but, I'm certain, from hitting the point that they can't "see" a solution and then feel like they can't do it. I am so thankful we homeschool and that we can work through those moments. Is it all la la's and sunshine and roses? Oh HECK no, there are loud voices and tears plenty, but that's just us in general anyway ;) But we do get through it, and I pray that they are learning how to plan accordingly for who they are and understanding that the key is knowing how their minds work. I believe that being aware of, and embracing, the differences will help them be able to fulfill whatever dreams they have for themselves. They might have to take other-than-typical routes, but with happiness as the end result and as long as the route is full of good, does it matter? Robert Frost thought not:
The Road Not Taken
Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth;
Then took the other, as just as fair,
And having perhaps the better claim
Because it was grassy and wanted wear,
Though as for that the passing there
Had worn them really about the same,
And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black.
Oh, I marked the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way
I doubted if I should ever come back.
I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I,
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.
Robert Frost
