can't trust that day,
Monday Monday, sometimes it just turns out that way..."--The Mama's and the Papa's
Monday. Trip to the ER for me, thought I was through with this asthma cr*p. Its all good, all tests cleared, 2 breathing treatments took care of it for a while, its just now creeping up on me. I remember having panic attacks, and my brain tricking me into thinking I couldn't breathe, I wish I now didn't know what it truly feels like.
Came home to the box spring we got almost a week ago--okay, Brooke, stop laughing, yes it was actually only on Saturday now that I think of it!!--still sits in my living room, as does the cube unit meant for the kids' room, and that really was over a week ago!! My darling, dear husband, in all his concern bless his little heart, came home from dropping me off at the ER and went to sleep!!! Yea, bless his precious little sum'in'.
Hmmm, want to laugh, want to be funny, but it isn't happening tonight, feeling melancholy. Not being dramatic here, but lately my mortality has begun to occur to me, and I don't like it one bit. Yet, what can you do but embrace all that it is and keep plowing along. Everyone has thoughts and opinions on how I (insert you, we, me--whatever) should live my life, and how what I should be doing with my kids. I am ready to say to the next person, "so, can you tell me exactly what is sooooo wrong with my children as opposed to, oh, I don't know, YOURS??" I mean really, isn't that what they are saying? And actually, isn't what they really are saying is "I'm so totally insecure and unconfident inwhat i'm doing with my own kids (or see others doing) that I'm going to judge you". Just found a great quote:
"When you judge another, you do not define them, you define yourself."-- Wayne Dyer (Psychotherapist, Author and Speaker)
That's it exactly, and I feel better already. Blues, all shades, in my mind, I can go and let my mind rest.